Ok, these walk the line of being totally hoochie. I mean, even their name...but I like red, and I'm sure there will be an opportunity or need to be stupidly tall.
They're called Hucci, which is a few letters misspelled from Hoochie. Which they pretty much are, to be honest. Red velvet cage platform pumps.
Don't ask me how to make these marginally classy, I'm not sure if even I can do that.